 | July 5, 2011 Bad Boats Lisa Wingate, She Reads Featured Author |
If you could step away from one thing that is dragging you under, what would you leave behind?
Years ago, we moved into someone else's dream house. We purchased it from the bank after it had languished empty — built with great hope but then sadly abandoned. Soon, we began hearing stories about the place. There were whispers of substance abuse, violent fights, young children in foster care, a father in jail.
While I repaired damaged walls, my boys explored their new territory. One evening, they brought in a treasure they'd found outside. Holding the weathered Ziploc baggie, I studied the contents — two small clay pipes and seeds of a sort that undoubtedly shouldn't go to show-and-tell when the drug dog sweeps the school.
There are those moments when the world as it is collides with the world as you wish it were. It's hard to explain to little boys that their treasure must be disposed of in the nearest dumpster before someone gets arrested.
The lost treasure was still on their minds at bedtime.
"That's too bad about those people," my older son observed. "I'll never touch drugs. Drugs are stupid."
"It is sad," I agreed.
His brows wrinkled. "Why didn't they just quit before somebody took their house?"
"I don't know," I admitted. "Sometimes, things that aren't good for us feel good in the moment. Sometimes people don't see the damage they're doing."
My younger son turned our way. "It's like they're on a boat."
His brother responded with an eye roll. "We're talking about drugs, not fishing. Hello."
"Uh-huh," the little brother remained uncharacteristically serious. "It's a really bad boat, and it's sinking, and they won't get off — like in my Bible story, where the man was too scared of the water to walk to Jesus. It's like that, huh Mama?"
A lump rose in my throat. "You're right," I whispered, thinking about the bad boats in life — destructive habits, painful relationships, defeating self-talk, debt, lust, jealousy, a reliance on food, drink, or shopping. There are so many.
My new novel, Dandelion Summer is a story about bad boats — the sort that trap women into unhealthy choices to gain approval from men, and the sort that can pull the elderly into grief, isolation, and anger toward God. It's so easy for my characters, Norman and Epie, to see each other's bad boats, but they're blind to their own.
I see myself in both of them. So often, I find myself riding out the storm, clinging to the boat, when the truth is that Jesus is just an arm's length away. He's unperturbed by the waves, unshaken by the currents, waiting to help me conquer the storm, if only I'll focus my eyes on Him instead of the ocean.
Are you in a boat that is sinking? A relationship that is unhealthy? A habit that is destructive? Ask Jesus to help you get out of that boat and walk to Him.
Dear Lord, help me recognize the bad boats in my life, whatever they are. Help me to stop looking at the water, feeling trapped, and saying "I can't." Help me to gather the courage to reach for Your hand — to know that no matter where I am, no matter what the storm, my security isn't in the boat, but in You. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
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